If someone dear to you were to ask you now,”Are you happy?” What do you think would be your answer?
“Yes!” “No!” “Maybe!” “I don’t know!”
If you are happy – congratulation. I am truly happy for you then. But if you answer any of the latter, so what’s the problem? What went wrong? Why is so hard to be happy?
Am I happy? On the surface (everyday) level, of course all sort of emotions come and go. I can’t always be happy. But on a psychological and spiritual level, I am Happy! Yes, I can yell out on top of the mountain and say, “I AM HAPPY!”
WANT TO KNOW THE SECRET?
#1 BE YOURSELF and ACCEPT WHAT YOU HAVE
- Stop comparing yourself with others. It always look greener on the other side but that is never true as we are only seeing from one perspective. It is OK to be ambitious for what is important to you but when you start comparing. The green eye monster is never a good one. It will keep sucking you out of your life until you are willing to let go.
- Stop worrying about what others think about you – who cares? Only you do! So why create a ghost that is never really there. The people you are worrying about might be too busy with their own life to be bothered with yours. When you stop worrying – then you can truly be yourself. Focus on your own goals and dreams not of those of others.
- When you can start being real; living real, say what you think and feel, and aren’t concerned with what others think of you. Then, you are starting to be yourself.
- When I said accept what you have doesn’t mean stop striving. I just meant be content with what you have and enjoy the moment.
#2 CHOOSE A PRINCIPLE TO LIVE BY
I choose “Happiness”. When people asked me what’s my goal? I always answer – “Being Happy”. As simple as that. I usually get some awkward stares but who cares but me. By being myself and understanding that what other people think doesn’t make any difference to me — helps.
Knowing your principle – this will guide you in any choice you make in life. For example: If I have a tough decision to make, I usually ask myself; Am I happy with this? If I take the other path, can it make me happier?
Understand what it is that will make you happy. Everyone has unique requirements for attaining happiness. Everyone’s happiness is different. Start living from within.
Never be afraid to step back and re-evaluate your goals and your life. Imagine yourself as a movie director and your life is your ultimate movie. You have all the freedom to edit, revise and adding effects as you go along. This kind of approach requires positive but determine thinking and an open mind — you need to actively choose to be happy. You are the director so why are you listening to others. Make the movie of your life!
“Happiness depends upon ourselves.” – Aristotle
3# LIVE FOR TODAY & STOP WORRYING
- Don’t dwell on the past!
- Let go and breath! Every mistake is a learning curve.
- Don’t dream about an idealised future that doesn’t exist.
- Stop worrying about what hasn’t happened yet.
- Stop the blaming or complaining. (Move On!) Put that effort into making the situation better.
- Stop the impressing (People may like your things—but that doesn’t mean they like you.)
- Stop holding on to what you think you need. It won’t make you happier; letting go so you can reach for and try to achieve what you want will.
- ENJOY THE PRESENT!
- Don’t take yourself too seriously. Stop worrying as most of those worries will never come true. Human are meant to be resilience. Build on your resiliency.
If you can’t be happy today, what makes you think tomorrow will be any different?
4# ENJOY WHAT YOU DO
Do what you enjoy and enjoy what you do — and don’t do it for the money, fame or status. What is the point being stuck in a job you hate, surrounded by unkind people just because the money is good or for the title. Being happy is a choice!! So, if you choose to be happy – you will be. Don’t waste your time thinking that you are working hard now and swallow all those sorrow in the world because you are preparing for the “happy future”. It doesn’t work that way. Don’t waste your lives trying to make money, sacrificing health, family, friends and most importantly yourself in the process. Material will never be able to help you gain back what you have lost.
“Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.” Mahatma Gandhi
5# CHERISH RELATIONSHIP
Treasure those people who are important to you. Its not the quantity but quality. Genuine relationships make you happier.
6# FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS
What’s that little voice in you telling you? Start listening to it! Have the courage to follow your dream.
Build on meaningful goals.
“Learn to value yourself, which means: fight for your happiness.” – Ayn Rand
7# SAVOUR THE LITTLE AND ORDINARY MOMENT
- Stop and smell the flower.
- Listen to the bird chirping.
- Hug your loved ones as if you will never see them again.
- Smile to a stranger. Smile Even When You Don’t Feel Like It. I am not kidding. This helped when you are feeling down.
Say Thank You! (As you really mean it!)
- Take some time each day to do something nice for yourself.
- Hug someone!
8# MONEY IS NOT EVERYTHING
Often what comes with it are depression, anxiety, and low self-esteem.
“The most important thing is to enjoy your life—to be happy—it’s all that matters.” – Audrey Hepburn
9# UNDERSTAND THAT YOU DESERVE HAPPINESS
No one can tell you otherwise. If you believe that you are not worthy of happiness, you are already subconsciously sabotaging your efforts to achieve any sort of happiness. If necessary,remind yourself that happiness is a choice and you deserve to be happy. Happiness is attainable by anyone.
“Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.” – Dalai Lama
10# YOU HAVE FREE CHOICE AND COMPLETE CONTROL OVER YOUR LIFE. EVERYTHING CAN CHANGE WITH PERSONAL INTERVENTION. MAKE YOUR CHOICE TODAY!
So, what do you think?
- The Power of Positive Psychology (everydayhealth.com)
- The 10 Secrets of Happy Couples (everydayhealth.com)
- Who’s Happier, Extroverts Or Introverts? (dish.andrewsullivan.com)
- Come On, Get Happy!!! (parentalalienationnj.wordpress.com)
- This Map Shows The Happiest And The Most Miserable Places In The World (businessinsider.com)