I don’t even know where to start. I guess I have to say the first half of my 2013 wasn’t great. But it was not too bad either. I guess taking a step back now to think of it reflectively, I think I felt kind of unchallenged, unproductive and unmotivated. In a way, stuck.
My personal work with the children were great and I truly enjoyed it but work morale at my work place was pretty low. It’s quite hard to pick myself up at times. I think the only thing that was truly keeping me going were the children. They keep me sane, alive and knowing that I’m doing something good.
As for the progression of my professional development, I believe I am doing pretty well. I did SEASONS just recently and finished a foundation course on Interactive Drawing Therapy which I truly enjoy. I am also a provisional member working towards a professional membership with an association that is relevant to my work. So, in that sense I have learnt quite a bit this first half of 2013.
I have learnt that there are always going to be unkind people in the world and the problem is not me. It is them.
There is an old Cherokee tale tells of a grandfather teaching life principles to his grandson.
The wise old Cherokee said, “Son, on the inside of every person the battle is raging between two wolves. One wolf is evil. It’s angry, jealous, unforgiving, proud, and lazy. The other wolf is good. It is filled with love, kindness, humility, and encouragement. These two wolves are constantly fighting.”
The little boy thought about it and said, “Grandfather, which wolf is going to win?”
The grandfather smiled and said, “Whichever one you feed.”
I wasn’t feeling excited about life. I felt I needed more spice to it. I needed inspiration, adventure and to be challenged.
It was going exceptional well in contrast to everything else. I am comfortable in this relationship. I felt right. Oddly, enough! However, at times my ridiculous need for love challenged me. I constantly need to remind myself to be level-headed and to do so, I needed to make a few well-thought through decisions. Lots of reflection involved and thinking about all the things the future may hold. Putting my emotions and mind into the right perspective.
MOST SIGNIFICANT EVENTS, so far?
1. Travel to Siem Reap and saw the World Heritage Site of Angkor Archaeological Park.
2. Spending some time with my parents.
3. Seeing the Dalai Lama in Town Hall Dunedin (Tuesday, 11 June 2013).
4. Losing my baby tooth. Yes, my BABY TOOTH! Don’t laugh!
5. Experiencing Paul Simon Live Concert at Forsyth Barr Stadium
(Saturday 6 April 2013)
The first half of 2013 had been a tearful and doubtful one. But I am sensing good positive changes happening real soon. I already had a great news this week and it is just the start of the second half. I guess probably by the end of 2013, it all just balance up in the end.
Yes, of course – especially all my loved ones that I can count on (mum & dad) and continuously believing in me. And, to some beautiful people (Kayla M. & Sandy Y.) that I have gotten to know more better and had supported me in time of needs. I am grateful to (C.F) who stood by me during a time even I could not recognize myself or my actions.
I felt blessed by these people who love me and I can safely love back because I know they would never intentionally harm or hurt me.
And, I am grateful and proud of myself for being able to keep going strong despite any circumstances.
ACTION FOR THE NEXT HALF?
1. Gaining a full membership with ANZASW
2. Moving back to Dunedin
3. Take a vacation with C.F
4. Going home to Borneo Island to see mum and dad
5. Read at least 1 book each month
6. SAVE (I have a personal target to reach)
7. Learn at least 1 new thing/skill
8. Maintaining a blog post fortnightly
9. Explore new opportunity
10. BE HAPPY!
I’m looking forward to the coming half of 2013! I’m taking it heads on.
“Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.” – Søren Kierkegaard